This is more of a ranting and raving blog, so pardon the casual chatter.
Since the competition ended, I can not get out of my way anymore. I have seemed to lost all motivation to eat clean and lift heavy. I have barely made it to the gym in three weeks. Part of that is due to July holiday and now my nanny is on vacation. Fortunately, I have continued to run, bike, and swim several days a week. However, I feel like I haven't worked out because I have not hit the gym. I miss my weight routine. I believe that since I am off of my routine, I am having a hard time staying on a routine for my diet as well. I go through fazes where I am on track in the morning. I decide that this is it and I am going to eat clean. Then the afternoon and night cravings start.
I have been addicted to salted nuts with chocolate. I can easily eat a days full of calories just on nuts. Then I feel guilty about eating it. Then I eat it again. I know I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself. I want to eat healthy but I let my cravings take over. I am losing all sense of self control. I can't stop the insanity. I decided that I need to run an hour everyday to make up for the nuts that I eat. Then I swim at night to balance the rest of the calories. I have managed to maintain my weight but if I keep this up, I will blow up. I cannot afford to gain weight. In August is the Physique Challenge followed by the Granite State. If I can reign myself in, I will have a chance.
My husbands says that I should enjoy myself and not work out so hard because in four weeks I will have to be strict again. I agree to a certain extent but I want this to be a lifestyle and not a phase. I go through so many "phases" in my life that I want to make a permanant change. I am consistnetly "into" something for a while and then slowly "get out" of it. I stop not caring about that phase and move onto something else. I am tired of doing that. I want to do the best that I can with what I have.
Since the competition ended, I can not get out of my way anymore. I have seemed to lost all motivation to eat clean and lift heavy. I have barely made it to the gym in three weeks. Part of that is due to July holiday and now my nanny is on vacation. Fortunately, I have continued to run, bike, and swim several days a week. However, I feel like I haven't worked out because I have not hit the gym. I miss my weight routine. I believe that since I am off of my routine, I am having a hard time staying on a routine for my diet as well. I go through fazes where I am on track in the morning. I decide that this is it and I am going to eat clean. Then the afternoon and night cravings start.
I have been addicted to salted nuts with chocolate. I can easily eat a days full of calories just on nuts. Then I feel guilty about eating it. Then I eat it again. I know I shouldn't, but I can't stop myself. I want to eat healthy but I let my cravings take over. I am losing all sense of self control. I can't stop the insanity. I decided that I need to run an hour everyday to make up for the nuts that I eat. Then I swim at night to balance the rest of the calories. I have managed to maintain my weight but if I keep this up, I will blow up. I cannot afford to gain weight. In August is the Physique Challenge followed by the Granite State. If I can reign myself in, I will have a chance.
My husbands says that I should enjoy myself and not work out so hard because in four weeks I will have to be strict again. I agree to a certain extent but I want this to be a lifestyle and not a phase. I go through so many "phases" in my life that I want to make a permanant change. I am consistnetly "into" something for a while and then slowly "get out" of it. I stop not caring about that phase and move onto something else. I am tired of doing that. I want to do the best that I can with what I have.
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